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Tuesday, 1 June 2010

image for Charlie Sheen Agrees To 30 Days In Jail For Threatening Wife With Knife At Her Throat Last Year!

According to the many headlines on the web this morning Charlie Sheen has agreed to serve thirty days in jail for his holding a knife at his wife's throat during the Holidays late last year.

A spokesman for Sheen stated that he could have gotten away with no time served, but would serve a lot longer sentence if it happened again and that Charlie, knowing Charlie Sheen, says it could happen at any time.

"If he behaves himself, he could only serve 15 days for threatening to kill with the weapon. He could even get out in five if the judge is lenient and Sheen doesn't crack somebody's head. With shock probation, probably two."

When talking to an officer at the facilities, the officer told us that most of those five days he would actually be able to stay out from behind bars by helping empty ashtrays and sleeping on the couch in the visitors center.

In other news today, that jaywalker who was nearly ran over by Paris Hilton in California two months ago, causing Hilton to run over a squirrel, received a three year sentence and was fined $1500.

Ms. Hilton is in counseling for nightmares.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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