Glastonbury organiser Michael Eavis has made the biggest mistake of his career, not only on his last festival, but on the 50th anniversary.
After being given the 'best problem in the world' of U2 pulling out from the festival, he was left with the decision of finding a sought after replacement. Michael, who celebrated his 104th birthday last month was delighted by the bands choice to halt all live gigs this year but may have made one of the biggest mistakes the entertainment industry has ever seen.
Bearded Eavis accidentally booked a group of touring gorillas to take to the stage as the headline act, and not the platinum selling superstars, The Gorillaz. Eavis told this reporter 'how was I supposed to know they used a bloody Z not an S?!' he went on 'I must have paid 100 times over the odds on these sodding monkeys!, I don't want to talk about it, it's all a Blur'.
Emily Eavis, Michael's daughter and heir to the festival said 'Dad's an idiot' and that 'this is just typical, I said let me sort it out but he insisted.'
The Gorrilaz are said to be gutted by the state of affairs. Damon Albarn, the creator of the group said 'unreal, if people make these sorts of mistakes you're going to find Kids With Guns turning up'.
The gorillas will be performing the 'stand and clapping', 'peel the banana' and 'hug the zoo keeper' tricks to the 1,000,000 strong crowd, it looks like it could be an interesting performance. A GFJ (Gorillas For Justice) spokesperson is said to be delighted, Michael Nesmith said 'the event will highlight the talents of The Monkees performing' and promises one hell of a performance.
Meanwhile Specsavers are in talks with Michael Eavis to discuss possible sponsorship.
The story continues.