CTV Centre - West London - We've just been informed that three celebrities, Katie Price, Stephen Fry, and Cheryl Cole are stuck in a lift at Celebrity TV Centre in West London, where they made The Two Ronnies and Blackadder.
It is thought that the three desperate celebs are resolute in their determination to overcome their lift predicament and eventually emerge alive.
It is thought by staff that a mechanical malfunction caused the lift to become jammed between floors 4 and 5. It seems that Katie Price's big jiggling jugs caused the lift to judder and split a bearing.
Stephen Fry apparently wasted no time and got busy twittering pals to inform them that he was stuck in a lift again. Only this time with Cheryl Cole and Katie Price. In a telephone call to Adam Ant out of 80s pop combo Adam And The Ants, Fry complained that being stuck in a lift with Katie Price and Cheryl Cole isn't much fun when you're a gay man, and that he would have preferred to have been stuck in the lift with Brad Pitt and Johnny Depp.
The latest news we have on Cole and Price states that Cole is distracting herself by practicing a new dance routine, but that Price had refused to join in because her oversized norks would slap against the walls in such a confined space.
A CTV maintenance man had no luck in his attempt to free the trio, and the London Fire Brigade met with similar failure. As things stand, Thunderbird 2 has just landed in the car park and Virgil Tracy of International Rescue is assessing the situation while brother Scott makes a nuisance of himself by flying Thunderbird 1 over West London and causing air traffic chaos.
An insider told us that Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart were not involved in the incident, and that Cheryl Cole is still only 5'3" but working on it.
More as we get it.