Written by Abel Rodriguez
Print this

Sunday, 16 May 2010

image for Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart Argue In A Pedicure Salon
A photo of Kristen's feet swollen due to her being on her period.

SOHO - The world's lovebirds have sort of turned into a couple of raving ravens. Rob and Kristen stopped in to each get a pedicure at The Yo Yo Girlfriend You Want We Make Your Pretty Feets To Look Dainty Like Girl Feet Should Be Salon.

As Kristen and Rob were sitting next to each other getting pedicured Kristen turned to Rob and told him that she noticed that he was getting a woody.

Rob denied it. Kristen said that she could see it and so could Ling Chang the 19-year-old sort of stunning looking Vietnamese girl who was doing his feet.

RoPat admitted that yes he did in fact have an erection but he told her that it was because he was thinking about how sexy she (KS) looked this morning in the shower with her privates all covered in Irish Spring soap.

Kristen told him that she had not taken a shower this morning because she was running late and so she had just taken a wash cloth and dabbed her cute little Mrs. Fuzzy Wuzzy, her two bumpy bits, and the tunnel of darkness (*).

[EDITOR'S NOTE: (*) - (?).]

Robby told her to just relax and not worry because it was not like he was going to leave her for a pedicurist just because she had succeeded in giving him a hard on.

Pattinson added that if he left her every time that he got a stiffy from a girl he would probably leave her three or eight times a day.

Kristen smiled and replied that he was probably right. She picked up her cell phone and called up her ex-boyfriend Michael Angarano.

"Hey Mikey this is Kristen, I want you to think about you and I totally naked on an isolated beach in Dubai and you are boinking me beyond belief and I am screaming that you are the best lover I've ever had since Mr. Frackenberger back in high school."

Robby told her to hang up. She looked over at him and told her that she would hang up the phone once Mikey got an erection.

In other news. Since the Arizona Immigration Bill was first implemented, nationwide sales of Arizona Tea have fallen off by 800 percent.

Make Abel Rodriguez's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 1 plus 5?

9 14 7 6
56 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more