Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Friday, 7 May 2010

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Kim Kardashian says she likes Justin Bieber, but not in a kiss my hooha way.

HOLLYWOOD HILLS - Kim Kardashian has stated that she wants it known that she is not currently, nor has she ever dated Justin Bieber.

Kardashian said that the rumor started when the two were at The White House Correspondent's Dinner, and someone saw her feed Justin a crouton.

She said that Justin acted silly and pretended that it was stuck in his throat and he asked Kim to administer CPR. She did, as a joke, but apparently a reporter for either CNN, FOX, or the BBC thought that she was making out with the young Canadian singing sensation.

Kardashian, a well renowned Left Coast celebutante, socialite, model, and 'p teaser" insisted that she has no interest in the 16-year-old from Ontario, Canada.

Kim, who last year finished in 11th place on Dancing With The Stars, said that there is a 13 year age difference between herself and little Justini, as she playfully refers to him.

Justin, meanwhile said that he kind of thinks that he may just have fallen in love with Kim's firm as hell funbags, her firm as hell badonkadonk, and her vavavoomingly wowie zowie wonky wonk.

In other news. Al Pacino, Kate Hudson, and Cloris Leachman have just been signed to star in the production of 'Mission Impossible 10 - The Corking of Iceland's Volcano.'

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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