Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Saturday, 1 May 2010

image for Elin Nordegren Says Tiger's Number is 121 Bitches and Her Number Is 500 Million Bucks
Elin Nordegren showing how small Tiger's 'winky' was before he had penis augmentation surgery.

ORLANDO - Speaking from her front porch, Elin Nordegren says that she is fed up with the ever increasing numbers of her friggin bikini burger addicted husband's crotch cookies conquests.

She said that she cannot believe that the BN (bitch number) suddenly jumped from the teens all the way up to 121. Elin said that she has had it and she plans to move with her kids to Sweden where she can go to the supermarket without seeing her husbands half-black womanizing skinny ass face staring at her at the checkout counter.

Nordegren added that the thing that makes it even worse is the fact that she, by proxy, went to bed with each one of the 121 white, blonde skank ho's that her piece of reindeer shit husband did.

Elin plans on making an appearance on The Oprah Winfrey Show and revealing to Winfrey's audience that two years ago her husband had penis augmentation surgery to increase the size of his 2-inch pecker to 9 inches. She giggled and said that the surgery cost $700,000 or about $100,000 per inch.

In a related story, Elin Nordegren said that if anyone wants to see what Tiggy's little 2-inch bibbidy boo looked like before it got big you can log on to www.whatdahellisdat.dic

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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