Bargis Tryhol, the man with the world's largest penis, was discharged from hospital early yesterday, and he's already ruffling feathers among the great unwashed on the European side of the Atlantic.
Tryhol, has spent the best part of a week in recovery following a 'penile incident of an unspecified nature' which we are told involved having his outsized penis run over by a runaway lawn mower at a White House fund raiser to support the 'down on their luck' in Chicago. It was then subsequently speared by various stiletto heels in the ensuing panic, including said stiletto heels of Miley Cyrus, Kristen Stewart, Lindsay Lohan but thankfully not Alley Sheedy or Oprah Winfrey.
"Take more'n a lawn mower and a few puncture wounds to put this old anaconda out of action," a beaming Tryhol told the world's press. "Sure, I'll have to walk the ole feller in a stroller for a week or two. But ole one eyed jack is still very much in working order."
At which point, Tryhol moved on to meet up with his old drinking buddy, Fernando Monte Verde, 'the world's most interesting man.'
Reports coming in appear to infer that Monte Verde showed Tryhol a photo of English 'rose' Katie Price, former topless model, reality show star and bareback riding champion.
"Yeah, I've heard of her," Tryhol allegedly told Monte Verde. "And you can tell that Alex Reid guy from me that if he can't cut the mustard with old placcy baps, I can guarantee that I'd make her eyes water."
Look out for the sparks. They will fly.