Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Saturday, 24 April 2010

image for Taylor Swift Has A Crush On John Mayer
Taylor Swift says that a crush is all she has on John Mayer.

EL PASO - Taylor Swift had just finished performing her sold-out concert at El Paso's La Chupacabra Convention Center when she was asked about John Mayer.

Swift, quickly tried to change the subject by talking about one of the awards she had recently won, the award for Best Album by a Country Music Female Artist Who Is Not Very Well Endowed In The Bazongas Department.

The talk came back to Mayer and again Swift mentioned another award she had won Best Overall Hairdo By A Female Singer Who Does Not Comb Her Own Hair.

She was finally told that she might as well go ahead and address the rumor circulating all up and down the Rio Grande River about her and the 32-year-old John Mayer being an item.

Taylor blushed, dabbed at her hair, and then spit out a sunflower seed. She took a sip out of her Coke Zero bottle and admitted that yes she does have a crush on Mayer but that is the extent of it.

Swift pointed out that John Mayer is 13 years older than her and he knows all kinds of sexual words that she has never even heard before.

She went on to say that he is a very respectful man who has dated a lot of famous celebrity women including Jennifer Aniston, Jennifer Love Hewitt, Jessica Simpson, and Camilla Bowles (on a dare).

In a developing story. Taylor says that she has noticed that during the past few months her tiny, little, bitty titties do seem to be developing a little bit.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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