Robert Pattinson & Kristen Stewart, are really enraged about the stories on the internet about them. Pattinson is particularly annoyed about Spoof writers Colonel Juan, Skoob and Spectrum and made it clear this morning that he is after their blood.
At a news conference in London, Pattinson arrived to make his position clear with regard to the outrageous tories, sorry stories. Pattinson stood up and delivered his message, "Allo Allo, listen very carefully I shall say this only once.
We have not been abducted by Aliens, we have not been to see the Dalai Lama, we are not to be the first stars to set foot on the moon and we are not doing spells , we don't like Black Magic although the chocolates are quite good."
Pattinson left minutes later holding a box of Black Magic, sorry a book of Black Magic. On leaving the building he was met at the door by Neil Armstrong, The Dalai Lama and ET, who had forgotten his telephone number to phone home.