Written by Jaggedone
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Topics: Movies, James Bond

Tuesday, 20 April 2010

image for 23rd James Bond film delayed as Austin Powers is too expensive
Brad Pitt offered his services for the part of James Bond, but couldn't persuade Angela to be his Lesbian bitch!

The 23rd James Bond has been delayed because of the recession and movie-maker's failure to reach the soaring financial demands of the "Spy who shagged me" (who?)

Originally Daniel Craig was planned to continue but was booted out after being too brutal and having his nuts cracked!

Austin Powers was offered the role and there was no problem until he had to do a Gay, Lesbian, nude, romping hot sex scene with baddie Russian male/female double agent alias, ex Dead or Alive'r and super tranny, Pete Burn. (a further sign of budget cuts employing "bummers")

Austin demanded a triple rise in his salary quoting: "I don't mind having Madonna stick her bum in my face, but Pete Burn, WEEEEELLLL!!

Producers are desperately looking for a replacement for Austin and Pete (sent back to his boyfriend's to do a bit of "Turning Around" backwards).

They even thought of revitalising George Lazenby alias Roger Moore alias Sean Connery, they all refused on the grounds that they're too old to "BED" all of those young beauties and would rather play golf with their BALLS.

Now that Austin has gone they hope they can persuade Daniel to "get his nuts together, drop his pants and his salary demands" so the world can experience the latest episode of 007 saving the world from the baddies once more, ZZZZZZZZZZZZ?

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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