Written by Skoob1999
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Monday, 12 April 2010

image for Cheryl Cole To Audition For Britain's Got Talent In Disguise
Audition Crowds Gather For Britain's Got Sunglasses

Cheryl Cole is to audition at an undisclosed location for the upcoming series of BGT - in disguise.

Insiders say that Cheryl has been suffering from a crisis of confidence recently, and is filled with a burning desire to find out whether the people love her for her vocal talent, or purely because she's Cheryl Cole, the sweet natured young lady who everybody loves. Who just happened to find herself married to a cheating love rat named Cashley.

Friends say that Cheryl has been working really hard on her dance routines with dance instructor Dancing Derek Hough, and that the weeks of hard, sweaty workouts have led to her perfecting the Horizontal Mambo, the Cha Cha Cha, the Fucktrot, the Back Scuttle, the Butt Shuffle, the Barbed Wire Two Step, the Funky Monkey and the Head Jive.

One observer reported that Cheryl had polished her ring in order to show it off to the judges. Reports are also coming in that Cheryl's mum, Joan, is to audition alongside her daughter in order to lend moral support.

She is widely tipped to dedicate the song 'Hit The Road Jack!' to son-in-law Ashley Cole.

Cheryl Cole will allegedly perform her hit 'Fight For This Love' for the judges' delectation, although she is expected to change the lyrics to 'Don't Give A Shite For This Love.'

Cheryl Cole is still 5'3"

More as we get it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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