HOLLYWOOD - The land of celluloid, aka Gollywood is a funny place. Things that appear to be this are really that, and things that appear to be that are really this.
Marriages that seem happy are sad, and marriages that seem sad are happy, even if they happen to be common law marriages or common law relationships.
Some things however are certain. For example everyone knows that comedian Andy Dick is a dick, and that Jay Leno is a back stabber (ask Conan what's-his-name), and that Lindsay Lohan has about 4 million freckles including about 30,000 on her labia majora (ask Samantha Ronson).
Jim Carrey and Jenny McCarthy seemed to have the perfect relationship. They had a lot in common, both were white, both liked to eat hot dogs without the buns, and both agreed that Senator John McCain had and has one of the silliest looking comb overs in the history of politics or even in the history of war for that matter.
But something went horribly wrong. What could it have been? Was it that Jenny suddenly developed cellulite on certain very, very private parts of her body?
Did Jim suddenly start growing hair in places on his body that had never before had hair. Or maybe both just grew apart because of the fact that she started wearing crotchless swimsuits at the beach and he started painting happy faces on the tip of Mr. Winky-Wink.
Well although each one of those is a distinct possibility a very close friend of the couples provided the real reason for the couples breakup.
Shakira, the Colombian belly dancer, whose hips don't lie said that the real reason, and the only reason that the two have split is because Jenny told Jim that he is no longer funny.
Jen said that Jim's jokes are no longer humorous. His knock-knock jokes, which once brought the house down, now fall to the ground in a pile of knock knock dust.
She went on to say that his political jokes sounded like they had been written by Condoleezza Rice who would not know funny if it crawled out of a collared green and bit her on her cinnamon-colored booty boo.
And so Hollywood will say goodbye, au revoir, ciao, and adios, to yet another couple. And it was not due to alcohol, or drugs, or womanizing. It was due to the fact that Jim Carrey could just no longer get his laugh-meter up.
In other news. Eight out of Ten Americans say that they cannot tell the difference between Robert Downey, Jr., and 2009's American Idol contestant Danny Gokey.