Jesse James has demanded his money back from the exclusive escort service that supplied him with a call girl on numerous occasions.
Reports surfaced that James' penis suddenly turned black, shriveled up, and then fell off! Stunned, Jesse first turned to medical science and then the legal system for immediate help.
A spokesman for the agency, Ned Diggler, had this to say about any refund, "We do not give refunds. How do we know if randy old James didn't catch this from another girl...Or guy!"
Dr. Elliot Wagner, a leading expert on diseases of the penis and scrotum, told reporters that 'the Penisnoir Disease' strikes those who habitually use prostitutes that are unclean and usually unwashed between customers.
"Sometimes these girls have 40 or 50 men a day and neglect the basics of personal hygiene! We'll see if his lips turn black next!"
The doctor flipped some photos of advanced Penisnoir vuctims and said, "I haven't seen a case this bad since Tiger Woods came in with his 2 inch shriveled penis in a baggie!"