SAN FRANCISCO - Bruce Birdington, owner of The Prancing Pelican Record Shop has reported that since Ricky Martin announced that he had joined the 'Dark Side' his record sales have quadrupled.
The newly announced gayette Ricky said that had he known his 'coming out' was going to have such a fantastic affect on record sales he would have done it years ago and on the highly watched Sean Hannity Show.
Martin said that with the money that the increased record sales are generating he will build a shelter in San Francisco to benefit the battered egos of gay performers.
He went on to say that performers once they start losing their fan base begin to panic and their self-esteem, self-pride, and self-worth suddenly starts going downhill fast.
Ricky asked if one can imagine what that emotion does to a gay, homosexual, or queer performer, except of course for Lance Bass, who is always in a great mood and doesn't really know if he is coming or going (hmmm).
In other news. Rumors that first mama Michelle Obama plans to appear on next year's edition of Dancing With The Stars are false. Mrs. Obama says that at 5 foot 11 inches, she would tower over every professional male dancer.