Written by Skoob1999
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Monday, 29 March 2010

image for Cheryl Cole And Derek Hough Disappear Together
Keeping A Low Profile

Just when everybody thought it would be safe to emerge from hiding as the Cheryl Cole saga has been milked to the point of dehydration, and all the stories about the lovely Cheryl have been done, dusted and discarded...

It starts up again.

On this occasion, our Southern correspondent Bill Bell was enjoying a quiet pint in a Portsmouth pub, and formulating his latest Pixie Lott article when a contact approached him in surreptitious fashion and asked him if he'd heard?

Bill Bell said had he heard what?

Then the story came out.

Another twist in the Cheryl Cole coil of mystery and deception.

It seems that Cheryl Cole and that dancer chap from LA who stayed in her hotel room consoling her over her marriage break-up, that Derek Hough chap...him. Well, they'd disappeared together.

Cheryl Cole and Derek Hough.

Bill Bell's intrigue was unleashed. It transpires from Bill Bell's fine investigative journalism that just recently both Cheryl Cole and Derek Hough slipped under the radar at roughly the same point in time. Whether they disappeared to the same location is open to debate, because there is no evidence to suggest that they did.

They weren't actually seen together but then they weren't actually seen apart either.

Which essentially means that any conclusion is possible.

But leading heads in the music business have been seen to tilt to one side in apparent disapproval of something or other.

We know not what. So we can merely surmise.

Know what we mean? (Wink. Wink.)

More as we get it. Squire.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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