Written by Skoob1999
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Friday, 12 March 2010

image for Kristen Stewart - Dakota Fanning - Hardcore Scene - Hands Off!
DVD Cover For 'Lipstick On My Dipstick' The Hardcore Non-Lesbian Pornorama Starring Ivana Phuque

Twilight star Kristen Stewart was told in no uncertain terms to keep her hands off Dakota Fanning as the two filmed a lesbian kissing scene from upcoming movie 'The Runaways'

In the movie, Stewart plays real life rocker Joan Jett and Fanning plays fellow band member Cherie Currie, and the two share a steamy on-screen kiss. But Stewart was warned not to get carried away and let her hands start wandering, as Fanning was only 15 years old at the time the scene was shot, and child protection laws make it illegal for hands to roam over bumps and curves and stuff, but not illegal to kiss.

Stewart described the scene as "pretty hardcore" which suggests to this observer that it won't really be hardcore at all - at least not in the truly pornographic sense of the word.

Our Hollywood insider tells us that there is a wealth of hardcore lesbian porn available both on line and from DVD stores all over America. He told us that watching Kristen Stewart kissing Dakota Fanning was not anywhere near as hardcore as watching Asia Carrera and Jennifer Jameson going hard at it with a 24 inch dildo.

Which raises the question: What kind of weirdo wants to shoot a 'hardcore' lesbian scene with a 15 year old kid anyway? We say the director should be locked up in the Moorview Institute and forced to watch the baseball scene from the Twilight movie on a continuous loop for the next 50 years.

With his/her eyes clamped open with crocodile clips.

Fucking weirdo.

More as we get it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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