Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Tuesday, 9 March 2010

image for Girls Aloud Member Nadine Coyle Says That Her Diet Is Working Well - She Is Down To 87 Pounds!
a photo of Nadine before she started her English Garden Diet.

LONDON - Nadine Coyle of Girls Aloud fame was out and about shopping in London's West End in a micro miniskirt. Several reporters snapped pictures of Nadine and remarked how skinny she was looking.

When asked how her diet was going. She replied that it was going very well. She then smiled and said that actually, it was going great as evidenced by the fact that she was having a hell of a time trying to keep her pantyhose from staying up on her bottom and not sliding down around her ankles.

She confessed that her 'English Garden Diet' which consists of one slice of carrot, one slice of pea, and one slice of okra eaten with a two ounce glass of diet water is working like a charm.

Nadine says that just last night as she sat watching an old rerun of The Benny Hill Show, she looked down and right beside her house slippers she saw what appeared to be a few specks of something or other.

She quickly called her maid over and asked her what in the world was that beside her slippers. The maid got down on her knees to look. She picked up the specks and told Nadine that they were just little clumps of calories that had somehow fallen out of her body.

Nadine heaved a sigh of relief and continued watching one of the masters of British comedy Benny Hill.

In a non-related story. Denmark which leads the world in Internet use is reporting a new sexual phenomenon known as Facebook Foreplay.

[EDITOR'S NOTE: I'd rather not go into the explicit details of just exactly what Facebook Foreplay is, so I will let each reader take a few moments and use his or her imagination. Wow, is it hot in here or am I just glad to see myself.]

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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