Written by Amethyst Ryder

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Topics: Susan Boyle

Monday, 22 February 2010

image for SuBo Bro desperate for attention
Gerry Boyle: "Can you hear me now?"

Gerry Boyle, brother of world renowned singer Susan Boyle, recently made several efforts to keep his name within the circle of his sister's limelight.

In a recent interview, Gerry Boyle claimed that his sister's true dream is not to sing for worldwide audiences but to find someone to love her. "Clearly," SuBo Bro is reported to have said, "Susan's decades of voice lessons, participation in church choir, auditions in shows and talent contests, and numerous at-home practice sessions with piano and hairbrush all point to one conclusion: She's a very lonely woman who just needs a good man to make her happy."

Susan Boyle could not be reached for comment, but unnamed sources say she was heard by several witnesses to be laughing all the way to the bank.

Perhaps, speculates Gerry Boyle, that bank might someday be one of his own.

"True, Susan can sing, but has she founded a bank, an insurance company, and a music label, all under the banner of Instant Gratification for twenty-five quid?" bragged Gerry. "We'll see which Boyle leaves a lasting impression upon the face of Scotland, we will."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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