Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Thursday, 18 February 2010

image for Zac Efron and Robert Pattinson To Star In Remake of Butch Cassidy And The Sundance Kid
Hollywood stuntman, Titus Cassidy, who is the great grandson of Butch Cassidy.

HOLLYWOOD - Fake Pictures has just announced that they have just signed Zac Efron and Robert Pattinson to star in the remake of Butch Cassidy and The Sundance Kid.

The original 1969 movie starred Paul Newman and Robert Redford, along with the now Mrs. Sam Elliot, Katherine Ross, who had just finished portraying Elaine Robinson in the Dustin Hoffman movie The Graduate.

Ross later went on to gain fame and notoriety in The Graduate prequel, The Under Graduate (1970), as well as sequels, The Unemployed Graduate (1971), and The Still Unemployed Graduate (1972).

The great Paul Newman later starred in Amaretto Monteverdi's Civil War classic movie trilogy, Bull Run 1, Bull Run 2, and Bull Run 4.

[EDITOR'S NOTE: 'Bull Run 3' was never released due to the naked scenes involving the hookers which traveled with General Joseph Hooker's army. These 'soiled doves' were hired to prevent any of his soldiers from deserting. And it worked damn good. Gen. Hooker's army had no deserters whatsoever. Monteverdi adamantly refused to edit out the nude scenes because he said they were vital to show the movie goer exactly what Civil War hookers looked like when they were naked.]

Robert Pattinson will portray Butch Cassidy and Zac Efron will portray The Sundance Kid. And cast as the lovely love interest character Etta Place will be Keira Knightley.

Monteverdi was asked about the fact that the real Etta Place was very well-endowed, in the bosom department and that Knightley, even though a very beautiful looking woman, did not have any tata's or even tatita's to speak of.

Amaretto Monteverdi, who in 2001, won an Academy Award for his film about Lady Godiva's naked ride in 1057, at the age of 17, entitled, Hey, What The Hell Are You Staring At?, said that in regards to Miss Knightley not having any thigbitties, that will not be a problem because the production company keeps over 50 boxes of Kleenex on hand to use as bra-stuffers.

Robert Pattinson was asked what he thinks about playing the famed old West outlaw Butch Cassidy. Pattinson said that he is honored and he recently saw the 1969 film and was mesmerized by the story and says that he is really looking forward to hugging, kissing, and having simulated sex with the Etta Place character portrayed by Keira Knightley.

Zac Efron stated that he had seen the original movie two years ago and he fell in love with the fact that two characters from the American cowboy days ended up traveling to Bolivia where there were no outlaws, no longhorns, no Comanche Indians, and no gorgeous women of ill-repute like Etta Place.

Efron was asked what he thought about acting with the older Keira Knightley. He said that it did not matter to him and that he was oh so looking forward for his character The Sundance Kid getting together with Keira Knightley's character Etta Place and making out with her, feeling her up, and simulating 'hide the salami' with her.

For more information on Butch Cassidy, The Sundance Kid, and Etta Place read Etta Place's autobiography entitled, "My Years Of Getting Poked By The Old West's Best."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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