Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Topics: Katie Couric

Saturday, 6 February 2010

image for Katie "Cougar" Couric Hates Being Called A Cougar - Okay How About Cradle Robber?
Katie Couric at the age of 21, way, way before she became a 'cougar.'

RALEIGH, North Carolina - CBS anchorwoman Katie Couric was in town as the guest speaker of The Mason Dixon Tobacco Growers of America.

Couric, a non-smoker says that although she does not smoke she believes in the right of every smoker to smoke even if it means that his or her second-hand smoke may enter into the space of a non-smoker.

She adds that America was founded on the principle that all men are created with an equal urge to partake of the evil tobacco plant.

Couric points out that if we take away the right of the smoker to smoke then next we will take away the right of the drinker to drink, and then who knows what would be next, perhaps we will then take away the right of the dancer to dance.

Katie was asked about the fact that there is a 17 year age difference between her and her boyfriend, Brooks Perlin. Couric became defensive and right away asked if that was a problem.

When told that it was not a problem, but that her 'May - December' relationship is something that everyone wonders about since she is in the public eye and is paid $15 million a year.

She just shrugged her shoulders. She was asked how it felt to be a cougar. Katie exploded. She stood up and she angrily stated that she resented being called a cougar and that she had not chased after Perlin and furthermore she remarked that she had never ever chased after a boy of man.

She then thought about it for a while and added, well except for Buddy Biggalengetti, but that was way back in the first grade.

Couric then reiterated that she does not like being called a cougar and nobody better be calling her a cougar. She was then asked, "Okay fair enough. So then tell me Ms. Couric, how do you then feel about the term cradle robber?"

Katie turned as red as a ripe Tennessee tomato and stormed off towards the bathroom.

In related news. Bridget Bardot who is 75, is dating a much younger man, Pierre Lafayette, who is only 26. When she is asked if the 49 year age difference does not bother her she replies by saying that the two have so much fun that they do not have time to stop to think about their age difference. When asked what they do, Bardot says that they pass the time by having Pierre count the wrinkles on the various parts of her body. He also counts her stretch marks, her varicose veins, her cellulite, her freckles, and the hairs on her pubic region.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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