Written by Xinix Xaxx
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Friday, 29 January 2010

image for Scooby Doo opening a New Martial Arts School
Harold Fenton, Scooby Doo's Business Partner and Student

The TV and movie legend, Scooby Doo, known for his portrayal of a cowardly crime solving dog, is taking a little time off from performing to engage in his other love: Tae Kwon Do Moo Duk Kwan.

Scooby's new school will actually be a blending of traditional Tae Kwon Do and other martial arts systems, rolled into a hybrid system that will be called Scooby-Fu.

"I wanted to call it Tae-sho-jitsu-do, but my close friend and public relations expert Harold Fenton, said to use my own name as part of the name of the style, to go with something people would know right away. He came up with Scooby-Fu. I probably would have gone with Scooby Ryu if he hadn't invested, right there and then, so he could overrule me on the name!" Scooby told this reporter with a chuckle.

"Scooby is a master of martial arts," Fenton replied, "But the name he wanted to use was awful. Going with Scooby-Fu will tell parents a lot more with just three syllables. It says Scooby is the master, that it's some kind of karate and that it's probably child-friendly. Scooby, after all, has delighted children with his TV shows for decades."

Scooby's martial arts style stresses self defense and self preservation. It's not a totally passive style, it's an active defense that a person can really use to protect themselves even from an armed attacker. Scooby demonstrated some of his techniques by having Harold Fenton "attack" him with a rubber training knife, and in a flash, Fenton was disarmed, on the gound, and had Scooby sitting on his chest holding the knife. Scooby handed over a cap gun, and before Fenton could fire a single cap, he was again disarmed and at Scooby's mercy.

"This is advanced stuff." Scooby says. "This is not what I'd teach a first time student. First you learn how to keep from hurting yourself if you have to punch, kick or bite someone." He thought for a second and laughed. "Well, maybe I won't teach you humans so much biting."

Scooby already has several students lined up, including Huckleberry Hound, Condeleeza Rice, Lady Elaine Fairchild, Drew Carey and Richard Simmons, who claims he just wants to see if he can incorporate any Scooby-Fu into his workout routines.

"Maybe Scooby-Fu will be the next Tae-Bo." Simmons said with a laugh.

N.B. This reporter took the liberty of translating Scooby Doo's words into correct spellings for simplicity.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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