Written by Skoob1999
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Thursday, 14 January 2010

image for Davina McCall Forcibly Removed From Outside Suburban House
Nope. That's Not The BB House Either.

Irritating TV presenter Davina McCall was today forcibly removed by police officers from the road outside a detached residence in suburban Bromley, Kent.

It is believed that an injunction was granted to the residence's owners to the effect that Ms McCall should cease and desist forthwith from pretending that the residence is the Celebrity Big Brother House.

Horace Flutterby and his wife Mothram described their lives as 'a living hell' since McCall turned up in the street one day on the back of a flatbed truck and started pretending that their home was the TV House.

"It was terrible," Mothram told us. "She just turned up out of the blue on the flatbed truck and started shouting and bawling into a microphone at all hours of the day and night. We haven't had a decent night's sleep in days."

"Not only that," Horace added. "She brought along a crowd of extremely strange people who were waving placards about, and cheering and booing for days on end. What with the loudspeakers, the projections onto the walls and the crowd noise, we didn't know which way to turn."

What made the Flutterby's experience even more traumatic was when Davina McCall kept sending strangers off the street into the house.

A passer by told me:

"Davina asked me if I'd like to meet Vinnie Jones. Then when I said I would, she sent me into the house. I was gobsmacked to find that it wasn't the BB House at all. When I went inside I was confronted by a normal looking couple who were taking tea and biscuits as they watched Emmerdale on TV. The couple were very sympathetic as they shooed me off outside but it was so embarrassing..."

Police officers removed the McCall entourage this afternoon. They were last seen shouting and screaming outside a house in Dulwich, and the McCall entourage moved on to Bristol.

More as we think it up.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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