Written by queen mudder
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Topics: Russell Brand

Wednesday, 6 January 2010

image for Katy Perry dumps Russell Brand
The diamond was smalled than a regular crack cocaine rock, apparently

London - (Satanic Sluts Mess): It's just one week Since Russell Brand was seen going down on US model Katy Perry, on bended knee, outside the Taj Mahal. And now the wedding's off!

The pair were spotted this afternoon outside Squiffany's of Bond Street jewellery store in the middle of a massive bust-up.

Perry, 25, apparently threw a wobbly "about the size of the rock, stoopid!" after Brand had just shelled out fifty grand on a whopping great big sparkler.

The couple then had a blazing row as Brand began shouting:

"So now you want a crack-sized rock on yer finger, Sweetheart?" before attempting to seize Katy's engagement ring.

And then trying to swallow it.

Ms Perry retalliated letting out a sharp left hook with her brand new Gucci handbag, knocking the 34 year-old entertainer to the ground and upending him on the snow-covered Mayfair pavement.

She then ran across Bonjd Street, jumped straight into a cab on an impromptu trip to Heathrow Airport, still clutching the 'offending' ring in her trembling fist.

Georgina 'Sataniuc Sluts' Baillie is 22.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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