Written by P.M. Wortham
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Topics: Sex, Warren Beatty

Monday, 4 January 2010

image for Beatty Sleeps with Entire Female Population of Barstow, CA
Some of the women from Barstow, and even a few fellas.

The secret no longer being a secret, thanks in part to the recently released, unauthorized biography on Warren Beatty's life and apparent good times, new revelations are coming to the forefront as to where Mr. Beatty managed to reach the alleged 13,000 number of female conquests.

Though it was originally assumed that the Hollywood 70's and 80's heartthrob had notched his bedpost in and around the Los Angeles area, late news has been discovered from the small town of Barstow, California, indicating that Mr. Beatty may have been exclusively sewing his oats there.

Supported by numerous female accounts of being wooed in pubs and taverns around Barstow, Beatty reportedly was working his way through the nearly 13,000 adult female residents within the city's limits. "It's close enough to LA", says Wanda Doomy, now 56 of Barstow. "He would show up in his sports car and pockets full of money. Small town girls tend to show up for a guy like that", says Doomy. "Beatty only seemed interested enough in Barstow to kum and go."

Beatty is denying that the number is anywhere close to the 13,000 speculated by the biographer, where Beatty's agent, Alotta Trimm supports her client in his rebuttal. "It's probably more like 9,000 to 10,250 women. The author's claims are clearly, and wildly overstated", says Trimm.

Some Barstow residents agree with Beatty's agent. "Census numbers show that we do have that many women in town, but I doubt that Mr. Beatty would be interested in them all", says town council member Tyler Wanshat. "Some look like 7 miles of bad road, if you know what I mean."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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