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Saturday, 2 January 2010

image for Kirstie Alley Says Aretha Franklin Is A Moose
Alley: "Aretha Has Let Herself Go!"

What's happened to the R-E-S-P-E-C-T woman? That's what 350-pound Kirstie Alley wants to know.

"She can't have any respect left", Alley told UP2. "She better stay out of the water or Captain Ahab will be going after the great black whale next!"

Kirstie continued telling reporters that she could remember Aretha doing that great song, "Think" in the old Blues Brothers movie.

"Now she's bigger than Jake & Elwood put together, and I don't mean that in talent, unless you use talents as a weight measurement."

She then stated that she guessed that the "Chain of Fools" needed something to anchor it down.

"Every time I've entered a night club over the past year, the comedian begins talking right away about fat people and I know it's poor old Aretha Franklin that they are talking about. And, even though I know I shouldn't, I laugh so hard I just about fall out of my two chairs."

Finally Kirstie stated that Franklin should get back to being a "Do-Right" woman and lay off the sweet potato pie!

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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