Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Topics: Susan Boyle

Wednesday, 30 December 2009

image for Susan Penhaligon, The 70's British Brigitte Bardot Says Botox Just About Turned Her Into A Chimp
Dr. Crookshank out in the hospital garden taking a quick nap before performing his next botox procedure.

LONDON - Susan Penhaligon a British film icon who during the 70s was considered to be the English Bridgette Bardot has cast out a warning to other women about the hazards of botox.

Penhaligon who many also compared to America's Marilyn Monroe in her day said that she was convinced that having botox done would make her look ten years younger.

Susan, sitting in her English garden says that it is nothing but rubbish.

The 60-year-old said that she woke up the next day after having botox and found that her eyebrows had fallen and were sitting on her eyelids.

She noticed that her nostrils were now resting on her upper lip and her lower lip had fallen and was completely covering her chin.

She stood totally naked in front of a full length mirror and she noticed that her bobbers had now become droopers and both of her champagne corks were facing straight towards the floor.

She could not believe her eyes as she saw that her bikini line had now moved downward and was now actually located below her groin goo-goo which was practically resting on her knee caps. Her pubic hair had turned completely silver and it looked like both her knees had grown silver sideburns overnight.

Susan was so embarrassed with the fact that all of her body parts had suddenly decided to play musical chairs that she did not even want to wager a guess as to where in the world her badonkadonk had gone.

Ms. Penhaligon said that she wishes that she could sue her physician, Dr. Ackerley Crookshank, but she spent every last cent that he had on the botox treatments.

She added that now she feels like a chimp and proves it by saying that she has never liked eating bananas, but now she craves them about as much as a wino craves a bottle of wine.

In other news. France's first lady Carla Bruni-Sarkozy has said that she plans to record a duet with Susan Boyle. Part of the proceeds from the song titled "Awful Pretty" will be placed into the BritFran Bridge Project Fund, which is raising private capital to build an eight-lane bridge across the English channel connecting England with France.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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