Written by Helen Tarnation
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Tuesday, 22 December 2009

image for Nordegren paternity claimants: Two plumbers, two mailmen, one pool boy
'I'm the real daddy', plumber shouts at Helen Tarnation

Controversy over the paternity of Elin Nordegren's children first erupted on December 17, when The Spoof reported Elin's claim that an unnamed 'pool boy' was the father of her children, rather than her husband, Tiger Woods.

On the following day, The Spoof reported that two other men had come forward to claim paternity of the children: Morris Moriarty, a plumber, and Norman Nickerson, a postal employee.

Since then, yet another plumber, and another postal employee, have come forward to claim paternity.

This was revealed by The Spoof on December 20, as the result of an incident in which Elin crashed an Escalade into a hedge and a neighbor's car. Those injured in the accident include Elmer Pudd, a plumber, and Barney Pfaff, a mailman.

At the scene, both Pudd and Pfaff claimed to be the father of Elin's children.

Counting the unnamed 'pool boy' Elin believes to be the father, this brings to five the number of men claiming to be the father of her children.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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