HOLLYWOOD - Sarah Palin trying to do her best to get herself out in the public eye has just agreed to star with the hilarious Leslie Nielsen in the McZuckerwitz Cousins film, The Naked Gun - Please Pass The Baked Alaska.
In the film set in the beautiful, scenic, but somewhat frozen state of Alaska Palin plays the part of Svetlana Yeketerina, daughter of the Russian ambassador to Costa Rica Boris Yeketerina, the man who invented cell phones.
The beautiful but somewhat on the masculine side Vetty, as her grandmother Natasha calls her, manages to illegally sneak into Alaska from Russia by means of a kayak, which she built herself out of tree bark, old discarded People Magazines, Popsicle sticks, Velcro, and ice.
Vetty, who runs around wearing tight-fitting Daisy Duke short shorts, because the film's director Grill Crancovia said will definitely attract that segment of the male population that is between the ages of 6 and 96, learns that she has an inherent desire to go around shooting big game such as moose, caribou, reindeer, and elk.
Miss Yeketerina purchases the best high-powered telescopic rifle that money can buy along with a used helicopter from which to shoot the four-legged creatures.
Vetty becomes so good at her new found hobby that it isn't long before the moose, caribou, reindeer, and elk population dwindles down into the double digits and all four go on the endangered species list.
Yeketerina soon realizes that the big game animals are pretty much all gone and so she decides to move down to Texas.
In other news. Rumors that Mr. and Mrs. Lou Dobbs were spending the Christmas holidays down in Cozumel, Mexico have proven false. The Mexican ambassador to the United States Peso Aquafria has pointed out that Lou Dobbs has been completely banned from ever entering Mexico.