Written by Skoob1999
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Monday, 7 December 2009

image for Jungle King And Rat Killer Gino - Salt Of The Earth. Jordan Furious.

I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here, King Of The Jungle, Italian chef Gino D'Acampo was slammed as a cheat today, allegedly, by uber breasted drink swiller Jordan.

D'Acampo was accused of smuggling tea, coffee, sugar and salt into the jungle camp, in order to curry (Did you get that one? Eh? Eh?) favour with fellow contestants, an allegation which the chirpy Italian cheerfully admitted.

"I smuggled salt sachets in, in my shoes," Latin charmer D'Acampo admitted. " The rest were concealed in my luxury pillow."

Recovering from another monumental hangover, Mother Of The Year, Katie Price bitched:

"He's a cheat! My God, where's Pete?"

Which actually rhymes, but we'd class her more as a 'show it' than a 'poet'

Gino told us that salt is one of life's essentials, and that nobody should have to live without salt. Especially an accredited chef.

Responding to accusations that he killed and cooked one of the tame rats, which wandered unratlike around the camp, he said:

"When you are hungry, you eat. If it involves killing vermin is no big deal."

Asked to remark on the Katie Price outburst, he simply said:

"If her brains were the size of her tits she'd be a fucking genius."

More as we get it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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