(Defecated News) She's loved by all in the UK. The ladies would love to be like her, and the gentlemen would love to come inside her. But it would appear also, that out little geordie treasure is loved internationally.
Following he spectacular effort at pretending to sing on The X Factor, Cheryl 'Lost Her Cherry A Long Time Ago' Cole has been honoured with the 2009 International Mime Artist Award.
"Ah woz sore chooft to winn thart, Ah divvent nah waat t'seh", mumbled the munter from South Shields.
"Arm sore grehtfool, and it shores way aye dersorv t'bee namba wan in tha chatz", she added, while shaving her chest.
Her award was presented to her by the equally 'gifted' Fabrice 'Fab' Morvan, lead 'singer' of 80s Mime band Milli Vanilli.