Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Friday, 21 May 2010

image for The Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders 2010 Calendar Hits The Stores
Audrey Jo Silversuckle, who is featured as Miss April in the 2010 calendar.

DALLAS - A spokesperson for the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders has just informed the sports media that the brand new 2010 Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders Calendar has hit the new stands and book stores.

The 12 monthly photos were taken by noted naked calendar photographer Vording Grindenstuben who is originally from Denmark and who now lives in Toledo, Ohio.

Grindenstuben began his photography career back in 1987. Two years later he was named the official photographer of Denmark's cheese danish industry.

In the first year alone, Grinny, as his mistress calls him, says he took a little over 18,700 photographs of cheese danish pastries.

He soon got into photographing Danish muffins. He had fantastic success with the likes of Gunilla Ann Skanderborg, Sonya Sue Frederikssund, and Ingalill "La Labia" Ingkabing.

He was forced to leave Denmark, due to the sardine flu outbreak, and moved to Hackensack, New Jersey. There he met earring model Maddy McAfelly.

The two soon became inseparable due mostly in part to the fact that Maddy was a nymphomaniac.

The two soon moved to Dallas where they stayed in a mobile home with Maddy's twin sister Michelle. Michelle worked as a steno for The Big Tornado Insurance Firm. She was also a three-year member of the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders.

Michelle soon introduced Grindenstuben to the director of photographic imagery for the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders, Ling Long Nikazuchee, 37.

They discussed the fact that due to the astronomical cost of the new Cowboy Stadium, which was $1.15 billion, coupled with the astonishing player salaries Cowboys owner Jerry Jones had decided that they had to do something to generate some much needed revenue.

When Miss Nikazuchee informed him of Grindentuben's idea of a naked cheerleaders calendar and the fact that it could easily generate income revenue of $18 million Jones smiled like the Corpus Christi cat that swallowed the Corsicana canary and told them to work out the details.

SIDENOTE: Two of the cheerleaders informed Mr. Jones that they felt uncomfortable 'showcasing' their naked bodies for all of the sports world to see. Jones raised his eyebrows and in a Donald Trump voice said, "You're fired!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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