Written by Aisubeki Akiudo
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Friday, 27 November 2009

image for Paris Hilton Sells Her Farts
Paris lets one rip for her fans.

In what can only be described as a revolution, hotel heiress Paris Hilton has 'bottled her bottom burps'.

"People love my fragrances, so I'd thought that I'd give them something more personal", explained Ms Hilton. During the fictitious interview, she was squatting with a garden hose up her dirt-hole with the other end in a large vacuum-sealed tank.

Fans who by her new 'cologne from the colon' are in for an exciting treat. During the production, for one day, Ms Hilton had been suffering after a night of curry and Cobra beer. This resulted in six bottles of her 'poofume' fragrance containing surprises that 'followed through'. Much like the special wrappers in Willy Wonka's factory, the holder of the 'bonus turds' will win prizes ranging from a weekend with Ms Hilton to a pack of Andrex toilet paper.

Her new fragrance, 'Pong de Paris' will be available in shops from Monday.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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