Completely and utterly barking mad, Mad scientist, Professor Gino Di Labia, of the University Of Pisa (The place with the tower that is in no way on God's holy blessed Earth properly vertical) today announced that he could, and would, bring the deceased King Of Pop back to life.
"It involves injections of some funny green substance," Di Labia told us. "That and some static electricity. And a thunderstorm. I'm trying to help Mikey out because he didn't do the London shows on account of being dead. A bit. And it left a bitter taste in some people's mouths. But I can help out here."
Professor Di Labia, and his assistant propose to bring Jacko back to life so that all concerned can cash in on the 'This Is It' phenomenom.
The late Mr Jackson was never a really big star, as he was a short arse, but he did sell a lot of records. The money he raked in from record sales enabled him to buy the Neverland ranch, a chimpanzee named Bubbles, and a load of overpriced tat that the average punter would struggle to flog off at a car boot sale.
Professor Di Labia told us that the world was a bleaker place without the skin-bleached anorexic kiddie-fiddler, so he fully intends to rejuvenate the baby voiced asshole.
Jacko's belt buckle weilding daddy, Joe, told us:
"It's good that Mikey's coming back. Because while he was busy dying, I mysef wud busy extablishing a record company. Mikey was ma boy, and I used to love whuppin' his skinny ass."
Professor Di Labia told us that if the Jackson shit worked out, he'd start work on Elvis and John Lennon.
Frankly, we're not convinced by the veracity of this story.
Neither is Ygor.
God Bless him.
The humpty backed bastard.
More as we get it.