Written by IN SEINE
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Topics: Pope, X-Factor, Jedward

Monday, 9 November 2009

image for The Pope in scandal about Jedward
Vatican spokesman: "the Pope will be too busy praying and therefore will not be able to watch the X Factor"

It is becoming more and more obvious, as week follows week that the Irish twins,'singers' John and Edward Grimes, a.k.a. Jedward will eventually win the X Factor. The boys, who hail from Londonderry are good old Roman Catholic ex-choirboys and with their bouffant hairdos, the Pope is absolutely certain that they will win because they have talent, most of all they can sing after all, that's what they were trained to do.

A Vatican spokesman for entertainment, Cardinal Sinn, and told In Seine News; "Catholic choirboys are some of the best singers in the world. It stands to reason that they each should have their rightful place as number one. There is absolutely no truth in the rumour that is going about that the Pope has ordered every Catholic to vote for the boys under threat of doing a penance of 25 Hail Mary's for not doing so."

"The real reason is more likely to be that people are really angry at Simon Cowell's taunts that they are basically rubbish! (what does he know anyway?) His promise of leaving the country if Jedward won the X Factor is probably a major motivating factor. I have it on good authority that the Pope himself is praying for victory and he has confided in me that 'God knew what he was doing when he made them - it's all part of a divine plan!'"

Simon Cowell is reported to have said; "the Lord works in mysterious ways." - he certainly does!

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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