Handsome British actor Colin Firth announced today that he has fallen in love with Britain's Got Talent star and media sensation Susan Boyle and they plan to marry at the end of May!
"I truly love Susan", First told a riveted news media. "Beneath that somewhat dowdy exterior lies a smoldering inferno of wanton lust, sheer sensuality! She's the very essence of womanhood. I can't wait to shag her every chance I get".
Boyle became famous revealing that in her 48 years she had never touched a man nor had ever even been kissed. "I guess I'm making up for lost time now", she told a reporter.
Firth revealed that he has lusted after Susan since seeing her on YouTube singing "I Dream the Dream". "No other woman in this world can belt it out like that", Firth stated.
Firsth also mentioned that he's starring in a new film called "And When Did You Last See Your Father" but he kept coming back to Susan. "She was a virgin you know. I never did a virgin before. Now I know what I've been missing!"
Firth further stated that he hates to leave his wife Livia Giuggioli but says the attraction to Susan is simply too great.