Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Wednesday, 4 November 2009

image for Finally! - Miss California, Carrie Prejean Settles Her Beauty Pageant Lawsuit
Carrie Prejean showing off her new $700 Paris Hilton Designer Jeans.

EL SEGUNDO, California - After months of legal haggling and maneuvering, the case of Carrie Prejean, Miss California vs. The Miss California Pageant and Amalgamated Entity USA, has been settled.

When the 22-year-old Miss Prejean was asked for the terms of the lawsuit settlement she replied that she did not know what they were. She said that she had left it all 100% in the hands of her attorney, Sherri Goldenseal.

Ms. Goldenseal, 51, said that the terms of the settlement had been sealed and that no one except for herself and the director of The Miss California Pageant and Amalgamated Entity USA, Lorraine Cackleberry knew the particulars.

Mrs. Cackleberry did volunteer that the 5 foot 11 inch, Miss Prejean was given her Miss California sash back. She further stated that it was done with the full and complete understanding that it would remain in the possession of Miss Prejean and that she would not put it up on eBay or other like sales entities such as eCreek, eLake, or eOcean.

The pageant director also noted that Carpy, as she affectionately refers to Miss Prejean, will also have her Miss California tiara, shoes, and bra returned with the same stipulation as the sash.

When Carrie was given the news regarding the sash, tiara, shoes, and bra, she broke into tears and asked, "Even the bra?"

When told that yes even the bra, she smiled with lips covered in tears and said, "You see, to those doubters, agnostics, and damn atheists out there, there is a God. And the fact that they are even returning my sensuously erotic pageant bra is proof of it."

Miss Prejean told Katie Couric that now that all of this is behind her she hopes to get her own reality show. She commented that maybe something along the lines of Kathy Griffin's My Life On The D-List, but with an appropriate title such as My Life As A Stunningly Beautiful Non-Conceited Blonde Beauty Queen.

SIDENOTE: The host of Larry King Live, Larry King has revealed that in terms of a monetary settlement, Miss Prejean came out with nothing, zero, zilch, nada, the old proverbial huevo de ganzo (goose egg).

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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