Written by Abel Rodriguez
Print this

Saturday, 31 October 2009

image for Nude Photos of Marilyn Monroe Surface At Michael Jackson's Neverland Ranch
This is one of the newly-discovered nude photos of Marilyn Monroe. The bikini thong panties have been photoshopped in.

LOS ANGELES - A Neverland Ranch caretaker who is in charge of cleaning out The Billie Jean Petting Zoo has said that he found a Manila folder stashed way in the back of the woodpecker cage.

Ranch worker Yuuki Koriyushu, 29, said that when he opened the folder (on his lunch hour) he was shocked to find about two dozen 8 by 10 color glossies of the late sex-symbol Marilyn Monroe.

Koriyushu said that he immediately took them to the petting zoo director Mona Frumpasetti, who then called noted celebrity Internet blogger Perez Hilton.

Hilton said that he committed about 18 or so traffic violations in his quest to hurry and get from his apartment in West Hollywood to Neverland Ranch.

When he looked at the photos he noted that about half had been taken on Ms. Monroe's 21st birthday. He said that a German chocolate birthday cake with 21 candles clearly verified his statement.

Hilton said that the 47-year-old photos were in excellent condition. He went on to say that he has decided to place the 24 photos up on eBay.

When asked how much he figures he will end up getting for the total collection, he replied that he knows he will get at least $7 million and perhaps as much as $11.1 million.

He pointed out that the photos are very explicit in nature and that they show seven little bitty tiny salt grain size moles right smack dab on her (blank).

Perez (Hilton) noted that he has since researched it and he found out that no one knew that Marilyn had those seven little bitty tiny salt grain size moles on her (whatchamacallit), not even ex-husband Joe DiMaggio, ex-boyfriend mobster Sam Giancana, or talk show host Larry King.

In a related story. Since Perez Hilton first put the story of the lost Marilyn Monroe Neverland photos on his blog, the sale of Marilyn Monroe school lunchboxes has gone up by 7,000 percent.

Make Abel Rodriguez's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 3 plus 1?

6 15 8 4
54 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more