Written by Steddyeddy
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Saturday, 17 October 2009

image for Man charged for hitting X-factor singer Leona Lewis
People were charged £10 to throw brocolli at Miss Lewis

A man was charged today for hitting X-factor singer Leona Lewis at a book-signing event in a bookshop in the centre of a town earlier today.

In an unprovoked attack, the mysterious man, named Simon Walsh, was apprehended by the police after the attack and taken to the local police station for questioning.

His defence lawer, Mr Grabcash, issued a statement saying that he felt charging his client £300 for hitting Miss Lewis was extortionate.

The police said that there was actually a queue to hit Miss Lewis, and the charge at the time was £20 for a thump and £40 to poke her with a an item of fruit or vegetable.

He said that it was unfortunate that Mr Walsh chose to skip the queue, and that there were plenty of notices in the area saying that those who wished to hit Miss Lewis should form an orderly queue and be charged their fee like anyone else.

However, there are many who believe that there should be no charge, and a chap named Henry Nobelprise was wondering if there might be any chance he could hit Paris Hilton.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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