Written by Wire Piddle
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Friday, 18 September 2009

image for 90% Of Attendants To Mary Travers Funeral Believed To Be On Medicinal Marijuana

Danbury, Connecticut - It has been estimated that the vast majority of the prospective attendants to the Mary Travers funeral are on medicinal marijuana, local marijuana grower Hodge Podge has stated. Therefore the church where the funeral is being held, the non-denominational 'Church of Our Redeemer...Mon', will be forced to take extra measures to accommodate the attendants.

According to a church official, all the windows will be removed and a 2 foot diameter hole will be cut in the roof to "...allow any smoke to dissipate from the building in a prompt fashion."

While most people who are prescribed medical marijuana take it orally in capsule form, it is believed that most of the attendants to the funeral prefer to take theirs using more traditional methods. A communal bong standing 9 feet tall, made by a local glass artisan, has been installed in the church bell tower.

On another note, Hodge Podge has volunteered his services as bell ringer.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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