Written by Skoob1999
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Saturday, 12 September 2009

image for Kristen Stewart Denies Rob Pattinson Bonkathon Rumour
Robert Pattinson Pictured Last Night Getting As Far Away From Controversy As Possible.

Twilight starlet Kristen Stewart today emerged from her trailer at MGM studios in Hollywood to deny rumours that she had taken part in a three day bonkathon with co-star Robert Pattinson.

"It's just not true," a tearful Stewart told the assembled press and papparazzi. "Rob and I just work together. That's it. That's all there is to it. He has a girlfriend and I have a boyfriend. Any suggestion that Robert and I took part in a three day sex orgy cum bonkathon is just plain silly."

I asked Ms Stewart where such rumours may have originated.

"I don't really know," she sobbed. "There are some people out there, particularly on the internet, who just use our names to boost their flagging ratings on crappy satirical websites. They know that if you put Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart in a headline, it's going to attract lots of hits, even though it may not be all that funny."

So, I asked, "Is there any truth in the rumour that you've gotten real close with Lindsay Lohan?"

"You're just stupid," Stewart told us. "Stupid and dumb."

Which got me thinking...

More as I get it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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