Written by queen mudder
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Topics: Sex, Emma Watson

Thursday, 10 September 2009

image for Brown Freshman Week kinky initiation ritual for Emma Watson and Scout LaRue Willis!
From the sorority brochure...

Providence, Rhode Island - (Poison Ivy League Mess): 'A lot like the Skull And Bones but without the osteoporosis'.

That's how acolytes describe the ceremonial that awaits Scarlet Letter actress Scout LaRue Willis and Harry Potter star Emma Watson this week.

Hundreds of extra security guards have been drafted in as the two lovelies prepare to enrol for their ceremonial rites of, er... (back?) passage into Brown University's FemSex sorority.

The not-for-prophet society organises the official strip search and ritual shaving of initiates' bodily hair.

This is usually followed by a leisurely sacred snake oil anointment, tantric massage and tattooing before Freshman rites commence.

"Usually we then escort them naked under moonlight to the university's Van Wicca Gates to begin their From Bondage to Self-Mastery ordeal," a sorority source explained.

"Think alcohol, bongs, optional crystal meth ahead of the handcuffs, dildoes and vibrators!"

After being tied to the university's famous portals initiates are ordered to confess their sins or risk losing their viginity.

"Of course anyone found to be hymen-challenged is let loose and given a packet of condoms," the s-pokes woman added.

The next full moon is the Sperm Harvest Moon of 4 October.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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