Written by Morse
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Thursday, 27 August 2009

image for Unemployed Spoofer Madam Bitters Lands on Her Feet With Blockbuster Catwoman Role!
Madam Bitters in Her Role as Catwoman: Licks her Lips in Anticipation of Big Screen Debut!

Tumbleweed, Texas/ Not Exactly Hollywood & Vine - Sometimes Spoof Contributor, versatile character actress, Sexual Surrogate, cake baker to the stars and advice columnist Madam "Kitty" bitters extended her 'nine lives' yesterday when it was announced she would be the next "Cat Woman".

The striking former Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader, will be following in the footsteps of Michelle Pheiffer and Halle Berry in the popular sado machochistic tale of a crime fighting "pussy kat" in a man's world.

Fans of the awesome and inspiring Bitters couldn't have been happier after a recent post indicated she was leƒt unemployed after an embarrassing incident in the local bakery where she toiled 12 hours a day designing, baking, and installing tiny edible penises on anniversary cakes celebrating 'Gay Pride Day'.

The day she was asked to leave she was said to have been found to have designed a chocolate eclair after the likeness of the mammoth appendage of Spoof Favorite, Bargis Tryhol, shortly after he appeared as a judge in the infamous San Francisco Fudge Packing event highlighted on 'Your Tube", an underground rainbow collalition of Fudge Packing fans highlighted elsewhere on The Spoof.

Bitters, although in marvelous shape according to Fan Club President Hal A.Peno, will be undertaking a vigorous training regimen to further tone her flawless body and prepare her for the rigours of performing her own stunts in the action packed movie.

According to her publicist, Bitters will be having a wild sex scene in the back of a "Smart Car" which will far outstrip hot out takes from "Fatal Attraction", and go on to defeat members of an Arab Terrorist group bent on taking over Health Care, legalizing Heroine, and banning free speech.

Most of the action is said to take place in San Francisco, and other high lights will include a car chase said to make Steve McQueen's dash in a '68 Mustang look like a phony slot car race, and a final confrontation in the city's infamous Haight Ashbury District resulting in a mind melting firery conclusion caused by an overdose of LSD during a Jefferson Airplane Musical Tribute during a recycling event.

Make Morse's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this


Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 4 multiplied by 1?

9 4 18 25

Go to top