Written by Chamone
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Wednesday, 8 July 2009

image for Brooke Shields Tipped for Oscar Glory after Jackson Memorial Performance
Brooke seems destined for Oscar glory (hole?)

Actress Brooke Shields has been tipped to win the Oscar in the Best Supporting Actress category after her whirlwind performance during the Michael Jackson memorial concert yesterday.

Shields managed to laugh AND cry during her 5-minute rambling speech.
She 'entertained' the crowd with 'funny' stories about how much of a prankster Michael Jackson was and how very close they were - although she later admitted she hadn't seen or spoken to him in 18 years!

Actress Gwyneth Paltrow - who won the Best Actress Academy Award for acting all English-like and having am annoying nasally voice - praised Shields' ability to cry but not leave any mascara marks.

Meryl Streep said Shields had a nice tan and her teeth looked "really, really white".

Rosie O'Donnell - who has won fuck all - said she would like to "get to know Shields better" and invited her out for dinner next week.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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