Written by Wire Piddle
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Friday, 3 July 2009

image for Crystal Defanti Sex Video Saves California From Fiscal Emergency
Crystal Defanti - 5th Grade Teacher Cum Porn Star

Elk Grove, CA - Ben Findlebaum, a concerned parent in Elk Grove, California, has been busy all night selling the Crystal Defanti sex video online. Crystal Defanti is a digitally challenged 5th grade teacher who mistakenly gave her students a DVD of her 'private moments at home'.

So far Mr. Findlebaum has collected over $3 million in revenues, all of which he intends to turn over to Governor Shwarzenneger in order to stem the tide of debt owed by the State of California to its creditors.

Said Governor Shwarzenneger, "..I'm quite shocked at the amount of money but do we really want to be pimping our teachers in order to cover our budget deficits? I think not."

However many California business leaders, specifically in the entertainment industry, disagree, stating that they have been pimping on behalf of the government for years and no one in the government has complained about it yet.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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