Los Angeles - (ReUterus & Toxic Ass Mess): "How long can ya keep up this pethidine/methadone scrip fantasy?" was today's rant from Michael Jackson's smack dealer's attorney following pressure from the family to up-play Wacko's prescription meds needs.
Prior to the recent postmortem Jackson's legendary heroin addiction was regularly spun my his PR AIDS (sic) as a congenital valium deficiency "with the emphasis on the genital aspect of the con."
The singer's needle-scarred body has precluded any plans to plastinate, embalm or even taxidermy-stuff him for posterity despite being almost totally pickled in anti-ageing serums.
At the Jackson family compound in Encino today frogmen were seen trawling an ornamental lake after strange methane bubbles were seen rising to the surface.
"Somethin' sure cooking away down there in this unbearable heat!"