Written by Jalapenoman
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Sunday, 28 June 2009

image for Unbelieving Michael Jackson Family Requests Third Autopsy
This one reportedly fell out on the way from the house to the ambulance (but not in the third autopsy)

The relatives of Michael Jackson, who refused to believe the results of the first and second autopsys have requested that a third one be performed. This one will be done at a different hospital by a different team of Medical Examiners. The family hopes that, this time, the results will be different and will give them the peace of mind that they feel they need in this tragedy.

Said brother Tito, "We feels like we wants us another autopsy. We don't wants to hear nothin' bouts any drugs. We don't wants to hear nothin' bout any gloves or gerbils in his ass. We don't wants to hear nothin' bout no sex changes or findin' out where they sewed on the rest of his nose."

"We wants to get good informations about how we can sue the ass offa somebody and makes us millions cuz out bankroll be dead."

With those requirements in mind, the Jackson family has chosen to have this autopsy performed by the media that helped get Barack Obama elected.

"They made theyselves a silk purse out of a sow's ear and put one over on everbody, so's we wants them to do the same thing for us."

"This time, it ain't gonna be as hard cuz Michael had a birth certificate."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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