Written by Wire Piddle
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Tuesday, 2 June 2009

image for The Only True British Act On BGT - Prince Philip
HRH Prince Philip

BUCKINGHAM PALACE, London - HRH Prince Philip has rendered his opinion on the talent show, Britain's Got Talent, and he thinks it blows.

Speaking for the first time to the media regarding BGT, Prince Philip says he is shocked at the attention a simple talent show can get from the world media. Most importantly, Prince Philip reflected on how little it said about Britain.

"If you look at all the acts,' Prince Philip stated, '... what percentage of them are really reflective of Britain. When I think of Britain, I don't think of boy-men dancing to 'gangsta rap'. I don't think of Scottish women singing hit Broadway tunes. I don't think of a saxophone player playing elevator music."

"No. I think of a dew frosted meadow on a dreary day. I think of chasing foxes on a well-rested horse. I think of a Sunday afternoon drive in a well-appointed Jaguar along a narrow country road. Then I think of going in for a pint of lager in the pub. Having a nice supper, kicking my feet up on the hearth with a few logs of wood burning away and an old dog at my feet. But, finally, at the end of the day - what Britain most means to me - at the end of the day, I want to see a rather grand, large lady with big knockers do a striptease that would peel the chrome off a lorry. That, to me, is what Britain is all about."

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