Written by Khadija
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Friday, 29 May 2009

image for Amanda Holden wants to appear nude in the final of Britains Got Talent!
A young audience member strains to see some 'granny fanny' on BGT!

Amanda Holden, 47 has expressed her desire to appear nude to JUDGE the final of 'Britain's Got Talent'.

Les Dennis's former wife has tried on 300 frocks and has broken down in tears screaming "Nothing suits me".

An insider said " Amanda has been really shook up after the belly dancer Julia Naidenko appeared on the program. After the show Amanda ripped up her dress and hid in the toilet and only came out after we agreed to show her a photo montage of ugly or burly women- these included 'Olive' from 'On The Buses', Maureen from 'Driving School', Bella Emberg and 'Grotbags' from 'Emu's World'.The faded beauty then seemed to recover and rolled about on her plush hotel bed with a botox needle in her hand giggling'

However the 'Bimbo Rage' has not subsided and fear of being upstaged by guests or contestants, has lead the desperate Amanda to suggest she judge the show in 'the nip'. Simon was not pleased with the idea but Amanda has compromised and agreed to wear to 'Fabia Cerra' glitter stars over her knockers and a diamanté heart over her bush.

'Simon may agree to this as long as she sits on a polythene wipe clean cover- he needs the chairs for the X-factor' said an inside source.

Amanda hopes her pitiful display of sexuality and flesh at the final will secure her a contract in America. As she is under some crazy delusion that U.S TV is not already littered with truck loads of Bimbo's, ageing Bimbo's and Joan Collins.

Amanda will be seen by the world on BGT clapping, crying and gibbering - with more irrational melodrama and madness, than when the 'Cookie Monster' first ate the letter 'C' in 'Sesame Street'.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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