Reality TV mogul Simon Cowell has admitted that the programme Britain's Got Talent was only created as a way of keeping ugly singers out of The X-Factor.
"Look, ugly people are all very well, but we don't want them on Pop Idol or The X-Factor, what with the Christmas single and record contract and everything. We got lumbered with Michelle McManus one year, and that was the most amazingly awful thing I have ever experienced in all my life."
The ploy seems to have paid off for Cowell, with attractive singers like Leona Lewis triumphing in The X-Factor, while the likes of Paul Potts are given an outlet for their deluded hopes of stardom on Britain's Got Talent.
"I never cease to be amazed by the public reaction when a grotesquely ugly person sings, it catches them by surprise because they're just not used to seeing it," explains disgraced former newspaper editor Piers Morgan. "That's probably because Simon goes to such great lengths to keep these mingers out of his other shows."
Scottish singer Susan Boyle is widely expected to win the final of Britain's Got Talent this weekend.