Written by Skoob1999
Print this

Tuesday, 19 May 2009

image for Wacko Jacko Skin Cancer Con
Wacko's Favourite - White Bread.

Michael Jackson does not have skin cancer after all. Newspaper reports which claimed he did were a tissue of lies gleaned from numerous dubious sources such as satirical websites and Jackson himself.

Jackson's personal surgeon, Victor Frankenstein MD told me:

"Michael doesn't have skin cancer at all. Somebody made that story up. Apart from odd bits of his body falling off at inopportune moments, Michael has never felt better."

The reports cast fresh doubts on the star's capability of performing fifty gruelling dates at London's O2 Arena, and were regarded in some quarters as being the precursor to Jackson cancelling the shows on health grounds and trousering the money.

"That isn't going to happen," the surgeon told me.

William Hill are offering 5-4 on a no show and 6-4 on Jackson's face disintegrating live on stage.

The Health And Safety Executive has advised that excessive skin-bleaching can be as harmful as excessive use of sunbeds and eating too many ham sandwiches.

More when we get it, because this story will have more twists and turns in it than an eighty foot spring.

You see?

We told you all this ages ago.


Make Skoob1999's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 5 multiplied by 1?

4 6 5 12
58 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more